


Untitled CoEd

by MrMagpie



Category: Radiohead (Band)
Genre: Eventual Smut, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, coed - relationship - Freeform, i could really use an ed, i write a lot of depressed colin and sweet ed when i'm depressed, this is sad but sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-20 08:56:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12429381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrMagpie/pseuds/MrMagpie
Summary: Colin is depressed.





	1. ch. 1

**Author's Note:**

> idk if i'll ever finish this. i probably will, cos unfinished works drive me insane, but it won't be very good.

Bedside lamps and a flickering television illuminated the room. There was a late night talk show on, one that Ed wasn’t much interested in. He typically liked these sorts of things, but tonight his thoughts roamed elsewhere. He was sprawled out on the bed, taking up most of it, as usual, while Colin sat beside him, his face buried in a book and his reading glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose.

Ed rolled onto his side, propping himself up with his elbow, head is his hand, watching Colin. Colin glanced at him, ignoring him, far more interested in what he was reading. Ed sat up, sliding his arm around his boyfriend’s waist, and began kissing him from his temple, trailing down his jaw. Colin pushed his glasses up his nose and continued to read. Ed slid his hand over his thigh, caressing it slowly, trying to get a reaction out of him. Colin just moved his shoulder, making an irritated face.

“I’m not in the mood right now, Ed.”

Ed sighed and moved away from Colin, lying back down. “You’re never in the mood anymore.” He switched the tv off and rolled over, away from him, reaching for his bedside lamp to turn it off. “Goodnight Colin,” he said, pulling the blanket over his shoulder and settling into the mattress.

Colin watched him for a moment, feeling guilty. He was right, Colin hadn’t made love to him in a month. Depression had moved in and settled, he wasn’t in the mood for much these days. He hardly ate, never cooked or cleaned, wasn’t affectionate. He mostly sat around and read, trying to take himself away to some fantastical other world found in literature, but he was never able to escape. Ed rarely mentioned it, trying to be polite and understanding. Ed loved him, but he constantly worried that love could only last so long with the way he was acting. He wished he could just snap out of it and things would go back to the way they were before. The depression had come on suddenly, with seemingly no trigger. He hadn’t even tried to explain his feelings to Ed, unsure of where to even begin.

Colin closed his book and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He removed his glasses, placing them on the nightstand and pinching the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut. He sighed, and lifted himself off the bed, grabbing a cigarette from his coat pocket and making his way to the back porch.

He leaned against the brick wall under the porch light, and lit his cigarette. It was cold out, freezing, but he hadn’t cared about his physical comfort in a long time. He held himself and smoked, tears slowly making their way down his cheeks. He knew Ed deserved better, and he considered breaking up with him, giving him permission to find someone who actually made him happy. He loved Ed more than he’d ever loved anyone in his life, and that’s why he needed to let him go.

He heard the back door slide open, and looked down, frantically wiping at his cheeks with his bare arm. He shuddered as he inhaled his cigarette. Ed made his way over to him, took his cigarette, hit it, and put it out on the wall behind his head. He scooped him up in a tight embrace, burying his face in his hair. Colin gave up, he sobbed into his boyfriend’s chest, still holding himself and leaning into him. Ed was gripping him as tight as he could. They stood there for a moment in silence, only the sounds of crickets, the buzzing lamp, and Colin’s sniffles and sobs.

“I’m.. s-sorry Ed.” Ed hushed him, dismissing the apology entirely, as if he found it unnecessary. “You… deserve b-better.” Ed only sighed into Colin’s hair.

“Come inside love, it’s freezing.” Colin allowed Ed to lead him indoors, his arm tightly around his shoulders. Ed lead him back into the bedroom, where he lowered him onto the bed and tucked him into the blankets. Ed crawled over to his side of the bed and scooted close to him, holding him again. He kissed him on the head and rubbed his back. “Go to sleep Cozzie, we’ll talk about it in the morning. I love you, okay?”

“I love you too.” Colin buried his face into his chest and let out a shaky breath, trying to calm himself. Ed fell asleep quickly, still clinging to him. The sounds of his snoring lulled Colin to sleep. What had he done to deserve Ed?


	2. ch. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hoping to figure out a title for this before i finish it, if i finish it. i typically finish stuff, but i'm just kind of writing haphazardly with this one.

Colin woke up feeling empty, as he did every morning. It had almost become comforting, familiar. Ed had moved away from him, now asleep on his back, limbs spread all over the mattress, practically pushing Colin off the bed with the sheer size of his body. He always slept like this, while Colin tended to curl up in a tight ball on his side and not move, Ed always flopped around and spread out. A smirk played at the corner of Colin’s lips, admiring how cute his giant boyfriend was. He untangled himself from the blankets, knowing a natural disaster could hit and Ed still wouldn’t wake up. He grabbed his book and his glasses from the bedside table as he got up and went into the kitchen to make tea. He put the kettle on, getting out two mugs and leaving them on the counter with teabags inside. He curled up on the sofa, book in hand, and glasses on his face. He tried to slip into a fantasy world within his book, but to no avail.

———

Ed woke up slowly, stretching, feeling as though he’d been mummified in his sleep. The spot beside him in bed was empty and cold, signalling Colin had been up for at least an hour. He hoped he had made tea, or coffee, or anything with caffeine in it. He didn’t expect him to though, knowing Colin hadn’t been up to much these days.

He went into the living room and found his boyfriend curled up on the couch, a blanket wrapped around him, reading a book. He spotted a cup of tea on the coffee table in front of him, and noticed the empty mug that was waiting for him on the counter. He smiled slightly — maybe Colin was feeling better. He poured himself a cup and sat beside him, cuddling up to him and giving him a good morning kiss on the cheek.

“Thanks for making tea,” he whispered.

Colin glanced at him and smiled a small, weak smile, quickly turning back to his book. Ed sipped his tea and watched him read. He was so beautiful in the morning, sleepy and soft, warm and cuddly. He wanted to crawl inside him. He thought Colin looked so smart and handsome with his glasses on and a book in front of him. It was one of the first things he noticed about him.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, Colin sighed and put his book away, grabbing his teacup and turning to Ed. Ed studied his face, anticipating what he might do next. Colin looked down at his reflection in his tea, grimacing at it. “Can we talk about last night?” he finally asked, still looking into his teacup.

“Of course.”

“My depression has taken over completely, and I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“I noticed. I want to help you.”

“I know you do, and I appreciate it, but I can’t help but feel like I’m dragging you through the mud with me.” Ed touched his knee, caressing it with his thumb.

“Look at me.” Colin looked up, still keeping his head down. His eyes met Ed’s. His soft blue eyes spoke every feeling he couldn’t put into words. “I’m here no matter what funky mood you throw at me, and I love you just as much as I always have.” Colin smiled at that, Ed was so good to him.

“I don’t deserve you.”

“Shut up Cozzie.” Ed leaned over and kissed him, softly, planting flowers in his mouth with his breath. It was the first time they had kissed in a while, and Colin realised how much he missed being close to Ed. He regretted avoiding his touch for so long. “Finish your tea, we’re going to have a shower and go for a walk. You haven’t washed or left the house in a week, so I’m forcing it upon you, okay? You don’t even have to do anything, just let me clean you and take you somewhere.”

Colin responded by scooting as close as he could to him, putting his legs over his lap and leaning against his shoulder, nuzzling his head into his neck. Ed put his arm around him and they sat like that for a while, drinking tea and soaking up the dull sunlight making its way into their living room window.


	3. ch. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i might quit this story here, i've got 2 more fic ideas brewing in my head that i want to get down before they're lost in the void. still haven't come up with a title, oh well.  
> my first ever smut, i know it's bad. it was really hard for me to write this but i really wanted a romantic sex scene.  
> i'm dedicating this chapter to a friend who thinks it's embarrassing that i write fanfiction.

Ed washed Colin gently in the shower, made him brush his teeth, and dressed him, all while leaving tiny kisses all over his body, and reminding him how much he loved him. He dressed Colin in layers, complete with a puffy coat, a hat, a scarf, and mittens.

“Is this all really necessary?” Colin complained, standing at the door waiting for Ed to put his shoes on.

“It’s cold out there, love. You’ll thank me later.”

“I feel ridiculous. What if we run into someone we know? I look like a child who’s been dressed by his mother.”

“Well that’s exactly what happened, isn’t it? You look beautiful as ever.” Ed kissed his nose and smiled at him. He was met with a furious glare. “C’mon,” Ed said, grabbing him by the hand and dragging him out the door.

They walked in silence, hand in hand, the cold wind whipping at their faces. Ed was right, Colin thought, as he buried his face deeper into his scarf.

The wind picked up again and Colin winced at the cold on his face. “How is this supposed to help me?”

Ed looked down at him and gave his hand a squeeze. “You never leave the house Cozzie, it’s good for you. Let’s stop in this cafe and get you something hot to drink.” Colin let Ed lead him to the cafe. Ed ordered for them as he found them a table and began stripping himself of some of his layers. He removed his coat and sat down still in his scarf, mittens, and hat.

Ed sat down across from him, handing him his coffee and smiling at him.

“What?” Colin asked, annoyed by Ed’s grin.

“You.”

“What about me?”

“You are so fucking cute.”

“Shut up Ed.”

“Your nose is red.” Colin covered his nose with his hand and held back a smile. Ed chuckled at him. He was so smitten.

Ed took a sip of his coffee and rested his chin in his hand, watching how Colin’s body relaxed upon having something warm inside him. He watched the colour in his cheeks return to normal, and watched how his eyes gazed around the cafe, as if he’d never left his house before. “Pretty neat, isn’t it? The outside world.” Colin grinned at him.

“It really is. Thank you, Ed. This is nice.”

“Told ya so.”

———

During the walk home, Colin’s heart swelled with love for his boyfriend, begging for release. He still felt an emptiness inside him, but much of it was filled with love for Ed. It blew his mind how Ed always knew what to do, always took care of him, never gave up on him. He wondered what it would take for Ed to stop loving him, but he didn’t want to think about that right now.

Ed lead him into their flat, helping him strip his winter clothing off and hanging it up for him. As Ed hung things up in their coat closet, Colin snuck up behind him and wrapped his arms around his waist. Ed smiled and turned to him.

“Can we cuddle in bed today?” Colin asked, gazing up at him with his giant eyes.

“I would love to.”

They didn’t turn the tv on, Colin didn’t get a book out, he wanted to be completely present and feel everything around him. He lied on top of Ed with his head on his chest, Ed holding him and gently stroking his back. After an eternity of holding each other in silence, he finally looked up at him.

“I want to make love to you, Ed.” Ed looked down at him quizzically, unsure of what he’d just heard.

“Like have sex?

Colin giggled and moved up so his face was inches from Ed’s. “Something like that.” He smiled and lowered himself to kiss him. Ed smiled into the kiss and ran his hands up Colin’s sides, squeezing when he reached his waist. He tilted his head forward, attacking Colin’s mouth and devouring as much of him as he possibly could. Colin held his head and ate at his face. They had made love hundreds of times, but Colin felt like tonight was the first time. He felt unsure of himself, unsure of how to make Ed feel exactly how he felt. He wanted to light a fire in Ed that burned with the same intensity as his love for him. He felt Ed’s hands roam his body’s landscape, and felt the way he moved beneath him, like an insect trying to break free from its cocoon and soar. He broke the kiss for a moment to lift Ed’s shirt off him, then immediately dove down to kiss his face, his jaw, his neck, and down his chest. He wanted to taste him, to feel him, more. He wanted to feel Ed come undone, to know that it had happened because of him.

He kissed and nipped his way down Ed’s body, leaving tiny bruises and pink marks trailing to his trousers, as he rubbed his throbbing erection delicately. Ed bucked his hips desiring more friction, and Colin would let him have anything he wanted. He wasn’t going to tease Ed tonight, he was going to make him feel nothing but love and release. As he undid his trouser’s buttons, he looked down at Ed, who was watching his fingers work while biting his lip and making a needy expression. He looked beautiful.

He snaked his hand beneath his pants and began stroking him, watching his expressions lovingly. Ed inhaled sharply and grabbed him by the thigh.

“I love you, Ed. I’m going to make you feel so good.”

Ed met his eyes and grabbed the back of his head, pulling him down. “I love you so much Cozzie.” He kissed him hard, and Colin sped up his strokes.

He took a moment to remove his own clothes then take Ed’s trousers and boxers off. He stroked him once more, kissing and sucking at his hip bones as his mouth travelled south. He held Ed’s dick at the base, and started sucking and lapping at his tip. His eye’s met Ed’s, Ed’s eyes during sex were so different from anyone else’s he had ever been with. His eyes didn’t scream _fuck me fuck me fuck me_ they whispered _I love you I love you I love you please take all of me and do with me what you will._ Ed held Colin by the hair, guiding him down onto him, slightly thrusting into his mouth. Colin used all of his fancy tongue tricks that he’d learned drove Ed crazy, Ed’s moans and curses music to his ears, signalling that he was doing a good job.

Ed pulled Colin’s head off him. “C’mere,” he said, and Colin crawled up his body, meeting his face. Ed pulled him into a rough kiss. “Lie down.” Colin rolled off him and lied on his back, gazing up at him trying to tell him with his eyes that he could do anything he wanted with him. Ed reached into the bedside drawer and pulled out a small bottle of lube and a condom. Colin wiggled beneath him with anticipation, which earned him the sexiest smile Ed had ever pulled. Ed lubed up his fingers and pulled Colin’s leg up over his shoulder for better access. He began teasing his entrance as Colin’s breath hitched and he moaned and whined and clung to Ed’s neck. Ed kissed him hard, swallowing his little noises and curses and drinking them down like the sweetest nectar he’d ever tasted. He work his boyfriend’s opening, stretching him and preparing him as Colin’s breaths became heavier and his disposition unfurled. 

Colin pulled away from Ed and looked up at him, trying to catch his breath but with little success. Ed was watching his facial expressions hungrily, still working him and making him want to scream. Colin squeezed his shoulders and choked out, “Ed… please.” Ed winked at him and pulled his fingers out, sliding a condom on. He positioned himself above him, Colin’s legs over his shoulders, one hand on Colin’s thigh and the other guiding himself inside him. He teased his entrance for a moment, soliciting whines of anticipation from Colin. He entered him slowly, inch by inch, biting his lip to hold himself back from being too rough. Colin sometimes hated how delicate he was with him. He grabbed Ed by the hips and guided him down onto him, trying to show him the pace he desired. Ed listened and responded to Colin’s every move, picking up his pace and beginning to let out deep moans that harmonised with Colin’s high pitched ones. He stroked Colin in time with his thrusts, both of their eyes closing tight and opening wide to meet each other’s gaze. 

It wasn’t long before Colin came, fireworks going off in his head and his vision blurring, spilling over Ed’s hand and his stomach. Ed soon followed suit, the way Colin’s body tensed sending him over the edge. Ed slid out of him and lied down next to him, both of them staring at the ceiling and breathing heavy. He turned his head to look at Colin and smiled, kissing him lovingly.

“I love you, Ed,” Colin whispered.

“I love you too Cozzie. Let’s go wash up, I feel sticky.” Colin smiled and let Ed lead him to the bathroom.


End file.
